As I was cleaning out purses to donate, I stumbled upon a note from a boyfriend of long ago....
"I am a little confused about us. Are we going out? Just friends? I know we're friends, but what do you want? This girl invited back to her place for a drink last night after class, but I declined. I really like you, but I don't know how you feel about me. I know sending an e-mail isn't exactly the most romantic way to ask you out, but what do you think? I know you've got guys lined up outside your door, but I have to know if you're serious about us or not. If you want, you can give me a call tonight and talk about it, or if you're busy, send me something and tell me what's going on. I'd really like to know."
That was back in 1997. It made me realize how much my pattern has not changed over the years. Still cagey, secretive when it comes to matters of the heart. I have finally started to let my guard down with Super Dad and it has been quite nice.
I also laughed at the perpetual fallacy that I have men waiting in droves. I only wish that was true.
Coming home has been good. It is allowing me to clear out the past and dream about the future.